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Home < Get PEP < From Trauma To Renewal

Power, inspiration, love and a new more profound commitment and relationship to life can birth from the the anger, shock, disbelief , fear and powerlessness we feel today. There is no one way or sure fire method that I know of getting from one negative, painful emotional state to another positive and liberating emotional state. However there are strategies we can implement, steps we can take, and attitudes we can nurture to increase the chances and speed of such a transformation. What follows, I hope is helpful to you. Because of limits on space remember it is an incomplete map of steps and strategies.

Step #1: Acknowledge the loss.

Strategy: Give yourself permission to take the time to talk, listen; give and receive information until you begin to understand "what has really happened and are able to put your grief (the losses) into words. This is best done with other people you love and care about. Both by talking and listening you assist them in their own recovery as well. Already words to describe the loss are appearing- "innocence", "safety", "point of view", "aspects of the way we live and think".

Step #2 Allow the feelings to emerge and come.

Strategy: No feeling is irrational- all feelings can be understood with time and effort. However for this process to
complete itself we need to allow ourselves to feel what is not understandable, normal, or usual for us. Allow yourself to talk out, or express (without violence) rage, despair, fear, guilt and more. Take the position that any and all feelings, you may be having are normal reactions to an abnormal situation. If you have periods of depression and despair , remember it is "often darkest before the dawn".

Step# 3 Deciding to move on .

Strategy: As in most things it is important not to get “stuck” or “addicted” to anything, way of thinking, feeling or substance that has negative consequences. A conscious decision can be made to go through this grieving and renewal process. Let yourself explore the new reality for its possibilities and your place in it. Be an active part of the solution! Whether it is exploring or returning to your spiritual or religious roots; giving blood; affirming your connection to loved ones and appreciating this days “gift” of life.

If you successfully navigate through this crisis you can expect a new more independent , resilient, and excited self. Tempered with humility, sobriety, and perhaps a quiet strength and faith.

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